


The Good, The Bad and The Defiant

by somethingfamiliar



Series: It Happened in Osaka & Continued in Seoul [2]
Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Bottom Lee Jihoon | Woozi, Business Major! Jihoon, Denial of Feelings, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Jihoon is a Whiny Bottom, M/M, Mentions of Cancer, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Paediatrician! Soonyoung, Past Relationship(s), Sex Toys, Smut, Soonyoung is a bit of a mess tbh, Top Kwon Soonyoung | Hoshi, Toys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-04
Updated: 2019-02-04
Packaged: 2019-10-22 11:42:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,279
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17661938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/somethingfamiliar/pseuds/somethingfamiliar
Summary: ~ A Continuation of 'It Happened in Osaka' ~A brief look into Jihoon and Soonyoung's past relationship seems to show a new story every time. This is what actually happened before Jihoon got fucked against a bathroom stall door and realised that things aren't always what they seem.





	The Good, The Bad and The Defiant

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, I don't think this makes much sense if you haven't read 'It Happened in Osaka', but it's sort of understandable if you're here for the Smut. Basically the italics are the past relationship if you didn't realise :) Enjoy!

It was laundry night that Soonyoung ended up working late. His paediatric training was all fun and well until people didn’t do their jobs and Soonyoung took the wrath of it. Jihoon had just got home from Seungkwan and Hansol’s place after they’d all gathered to order food. Soonyoung had dropped him a text at lunch to tell him that he’d meet them there, but another text came a few hours later to say it didn’t look like he’d make it. These days, Jihoon wouldn’t bother going back to his own dorm room. His dormitory mate always had girls over and he never really used to mind until one of them called him a ‘faggot’ and he couldn’t punch her in the face. His stuff wasn’t even there anymore, it seemed to fluctuate from between Seungkwan’s and Hansol’s, Seungcheol’s, but mostly all at Soonyoung’s now. They’d never really had the ‘let’s move in together’ talk, but Jihoon didn’t really like to over complicate things, it was easier to just let it be. Besides, he knew the code to Soonyoung’s apartment, he made dinner most evenings, he washed the dishes and he endured laundry night.  _ Alone.  _ Now, laundry night doesn’t seem like such a terrifying thing until you get down to the launderette rooms. As Soonyoung was in doctoring, his dormitory halls included all doctorate students- college, graduates and undergraduates and that seems like an appropriate thing to do in a university and changing dorms to stay with another student in their halls wasn’t uncommon. It certainly wasn’t frowned upon, yet that was exactly how Jihoon felt he was treated when he made it downstairs on Thursday night at 7:30 pm. 

It was the same as every other weekly laundry night- divide both his and Soonyoung’s clothes into ‘darks’ and ‘lights’ and take both baskets down to the wash and dryer room. Simple as that. Now, Jihoon wasn’t the tallest person, neither was he the strongest and that seemed to add to his struggle with taking the baskets down to the washroom. Soonyoung’s dormitory was floor fifteen of twenty and that was all good and well until the elevator broke. Yes, it had irked many people on laundry day, but Jihoon in particular had found it rather troublesome. There was absolutely no way that Jihoon was willing to walk down fifteen flights of stairs, with one basket, only to go back and do the same with the second. Not only this, but the dryers were usually all taken by the time he got there and Soonyoung didn’t mind drying their clothes on the balcony, so really, what was better than Jihoon climbing fifteen flights of stairs four times with increasingly heavier loads of washing from their dampness? Jihoon couldn’t remember a time Soonyoung had helped at laundry night. Actually he could, it was when they first got together, over 2 years ago.

Jihoon grumbled, he’d have to just try and take both loads of washing down on his own. That was better than standing out in this foreign dormitory hall for longer than he deemed necessary. He did wonder why he got strange looks from everyone. At first he thought it was because he was with Soonyoung and they were both boys, but there were plenty of other same-sex couples in the block, actually it was almost equally split into thirds- straight, gay and lesbian relationships all under one roof. It had surprised Jihoon at first, it was never like that in the Business halls, every guy was getting blowjobs under the table from the closest blonde bimbo to be found. When it came down to it all, it seemed that Soonyoung was fairly popular among the other students, so Jihoon couldn’t work out why they weren’t happy that Soonyoung was happy.

He got to the ninth floor, still thinking it all through, and rested a few moments. He was already short of breath and his arms ached from his shoulder blades to his biceps. Groups of students passed him, two carrying one basket or the stronger guys carrying the baskets for the girls. Jihoon couldn’t help but smirk, how stereotypical. He wanted to kill whoever decided there would be only two allocated laundry nights. 

“Oh, Soonyoung’s friend? Getting tired are we? Shame your darling isn’t here to help.” A girl called, her voice on the harsher side as the group of girls with her began to giggle along. They sashayed away, flicking their hair over their shoulders as he stared after them in confusion. It wasn’t much the case that his feelings had been hurt, for he had heard a lot worse, it was more about not fully understanding why they’d felt the need to say any of it. He shook himself off and continued, colliding with a burly student in the year above him. Jihoon’s top basket went flying, his and Soonyoung’s clothes scattering across the floor. He prayed that there wasn’t any questionable stains on the clothes.

“What the fuck?” The man yelped, knocking Jihoon to the floor, “What are you doing?” Jihoon pulled himself to his feet, his ankle crunching a little as he tried to recover, bowing low,

“I-I’m sorry, I should’ve been more aware-” Jihoon began, but the man was cutting him off, kicking the laundry Jihoon was picking up with the toe of his shoe.

“Ah, Soonyoung’s friend, aren’t you? I wondered when I’d get a word with you.” The man said sternly, a curl of hatred to his voice. The fact that no one dared call him his boyfriend is what Jihoon would’ve found humorous had the situation been different, “Soonyoung isn’t here to help, hm? Well, I’ll tell you this: If Soonyoung really wanted you here, don’t you think he’d be home more often, like the rest if us?” Jihoon backed away unconsciously, he dropped the armful of clothes back into the basket and tried not to lower his head.

“I don’t know what you mean, he has work to do, I have no right to pull him away from-” Jihoon began, stacking the baskets again and attempting to lift them into his arms. His ankle crunched again.

“It’s time for you to face the truth,” The man towered over him, stepping closer and Jihoon had realised that a small group had formed to watch, “Soonyoung should be home by now, he should’ve been home more than 3 hours ago, but here you are every Thursday, no Soonyoung in sight. Get it together, he’s found someone else, kid! He’s over you, you’ve had your chance and he’s probably getting better head from a better person. You don’t belong in his life, you don’t fit in here and  _ he _ certainly doesn’t want you here. He used to come home and rest every night, but now he avoids the halls like the plague, ever since you came in. So, kid, draw me a new conclusion, tell me he hasn’t found someone better to fuck. I bet you can’t.” The man stepped back and this time Jihoon had no dignity left to lose. He dropped his head and the group around him slowly trickled away. 

 

  * ••••



 

_ It wasn’t often that Soonyoung felt alone. He had a group of friends, he was one of the more popular students and he had his boyfriend, Jihoon. Not many people were aware Soonyoung was gay, let alone dating, but it never really bothered him. He liked to slip it into conversation sometimes, drop the title ‘boyfriend’ as if it were the most normal thing and he wished that it would be seen as the most normal thing. He’d never imagined falling for Jihoon, not even once, but when he was close as he was with Jihoon, it was almost an offence to get together with him. Albeit, their relationship had, in fact, blossomed from a one night stand on Jihoon’s induction day at college. Soonyoung expected to wake to his bed empty and to once again be alone and he had woken up to that, until he found Jihoon in the kitchen, laughing with his roommate as they made breakfast. Jihoon didn’t do feelings, he just acted and sometimes it was better than words, other times, it wasn’t so much.  _

_ Jihoon didn’t initiate moving in with Soonyoung to begin with, but little by little, Soonyoung would find small tokens in his house that he was sure he hadn’t ever purchased. It started with clothing, sweaters and boxers mixing in his laundry and strewn in his drawers, but Soonyoung didn’t blame him, he was almost always at their apartment anyway. Then it became books. Textbooks and notebooks and novels that he’d borrowed from the library. It turned into pages of notes and stationary strewn across his bed when he came home to find Jihoon asleep with the constitutional amendments tucked under his chin. He didn’t mind, really, he’d even thought about asking Jihoon to move in with him now that his roommate had moved out to a cheap apartment down the street. The only flaw in this was that Jihoon didn’t like to commit. It wasn’t a bad thing, yet, not a particularly good thing. He called Soonyoung his boyfriend, sure, but he wasn’t into holding hands, he didn’t believe in sharing clothing and he definitely didn’t believe in slipping it into conversation like Soonyoung would do. Maybe it was an insecurity of his or maybe he just didn’t want to rush into things and Soonyoung understood that, but that didn’t stop him from pressing it. The conversations were usually as follows: _

_ “What are you doing?” Jihoon would look up at him as they walked across campus together. _

_ “Trying to hold your hand?” Soonyoung responded, sounding more like a question than he would’ve liked it to. Jihoon pulled his hand away, stuffing both hands in his pockets now and stuffing his face further down into his scarf. _

_ “Don’t do that.” He’d say quietly and so Soonyoung wouldn’t ask again, until he finally brought it up over take-out one evening: _

_ “Why won’t you hold my hand?” He blurted out, instantly regretting the way he’d approached it. Jihoon turned to him in surprise, freezing a moment, “I- I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it to come out like that.” He tried to redeem himself, but Jihoon was already getting up, pushing the blankets off as he made to the kitchen to get a glass of water. _

_ “Why do you want to know?” Jihoon shot back and if Soonyoung really focused, it sounded a little threatening. Soonyoung swallowed his rice and reached to switch off the movie they were watching. _

_ “Because I want to hold your hand and you haven’t given me a reason why I can’t do that.” Soonyoung said softly, trying to keep his voice steady. Jihoon came back into the living room, sipping his glass of water and staring at Soonyoung for a moment before he placed it on the coffee table. _

_ “And why is it that you always get what you want?” Jihoon asked icily and somehow Soonyoung had seemed to have crossed a line. He didn’t know how or why or what line he’d crossed, but he ahd and Jihoon was getting increasingly irritable. _

_ “Jihoon, you know I didn’t mean it like that,” Soonyoung paused, reaching for Jihoon’s hand to pull him back down to the couch, but Jihoon was stepping back, “Why are you being like this? It’s just a simple question and I’m curious, so why won’t you tell me?” He asked again and Jihoon was taking another step back, Soonyoung frowning at him. _

_ “I’m going back to my apartment tonight.” Jihoon said shortly, grabbing his phone and keys and pulling on his jacket, “I’ll see you tomorrow, Soonyoung.” He said shortly and Soonyoung was beyond confused now. He pulled himself to his feet, upending the bottle of soy sauce and ignoring it as it seeped into his carpet. _

_ “Wait, Jihoon, wait!” He advanced, running to the door just as it shut and sliding out into the corridor of their dormitory, “Jihoon, stop! Just talk to me, what is this all about?” Soonyoung was getting frantic again and Jihoon didn’t make a move to stop walking, didn’t try to turn back.  _

_ “Soonyoung, go back inside, it’s cold.” Jihoon said steadily, not even looking at him, “I’ll see you tomorrow.” He repeated and Soonyoung couldn’t bring himself beg anymore. People had appeared from their rooms now and Soonyoung was beginning to get embarrassed. He bowed low and apologised for the noise, then returned inside. _

 

  * ••••



 

Soonyoung got back to the apartment just before 9pm, immediately noticing something was wrong. The baskets of laundry were strewn across the front hallway and it appeared that only his clothes were left. Jihoon was nowhere to be seen and suddenly Soonyoung was panicking.

“Jihoon?” He called, his voice echoing a lot more than usual. It seemed that his dorm was void of any previous furnishings and possessions, leaving the rooms hollow. He went on into the living room, kicking off his shoes in a rush. It’d been a long day, a busy day and he was absolutely exhausted, but his adrenaline was running high now. A soft noise came from behind the guest room door. They’d never used that room, well, it had sort of been used as an office or study room, but neither of them had stuck to that. He knocked on the door, pushing it open when there was no answer, “Jihoon?” He called again, noticing the small frame of his body huddled on the floor with his back to the bed.

“I’m busy.” Jihoon muttered a watery response and Soonyoung was stepping forward, eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Jihoon seemed to be folding his clothes, tucking them into his gym bag. There were several other bags surrounding him, books and blankets spilling out and jamming the zippers.

“What are you doing?” Soonyoung called, crouching down beside him, trying his best to make Jihoon look at him, but his eyes were downcast and distant.

“I’m leaving,” He replied shortly and finally he was looking at Soonyoung, his face blank and expressionless, but Soonyoung could tell he’d been crying, “Tomorrow morning.” Soonyoung became unstable on his legs and seated himself in front of Jihoon, pushing the gym bag away.

“What? Jihoon, talk to me, what’s going on? What happened? What did I do?” Soonyoung spoke a little frantically, but Jihoon was staring at him blankly, his eyes clear, almost looking through him. 

“It’s over. We can’t do this, Soonyoung.” Jihoon said smoothly and those words cut deep. Soonyoung was so confused and every part of him hurt.

“What are you talking about? Just the other day you were saying that you wanted to make this work, so what changed your mind? Why are you being like-” Soonyoung began, but Jihoon was pulling himself to his feet, standing over him with a furrow between his brows.

“You’re so ignorant, I know what’s going on!” His voice raised a few tones now and Soonyoung stood as well, trying to reach for him, but Jihoon stepped back, “I know you’re seeing someone else. Everyone knows, so why won’t you admit to it? If you didn’t want me back then why did you ever act like you did? I really- I really thought we could make this work, Soonyoung, but apparently we’re on even ground now.” Jihoon yelled and he was sure that the floors above and below could hear him now. Soonyoung reached forward to grab his arms, his eyes dark and his grip stronger than before. He wasn’t letting Jihoon go now.

“Are you serious? You think I’m seeing someone else? You think that low of me?” Soonyoung yelled back, his grip on Jihoon’s arms was almost painful now and a sudden thought flashed through his brain- _ I need to start working out _ , “I’m exhausted Jihoon, I’m working harder than ever and the only thing that gets me through the day is knowing that I’ll see your face at the end of it. So, tell me, why would I want to lose that?” Soonyoung said, his voice softer now and Jihoon was looking up at him with watery eyes.

“Everyone says you’re seeing someone else, there’s no other reason you’d come home so late every night. Everyone else’s lessons finish early, so where do you go from 4-9pm? If you really wanted to see me, you’d come home early, no matter what.” Jihoon breathed out shakily, a single tear slipping from his left eye, “I know you don’t want me anymore and I know that we’re even now, but why does it hurt so much?” His voice was steady, but Soonyoung knew better, Jihoon was tearing apart from the inside, out. He wanted to hug Jihoon and kiss every inch of his skin and tell him that nothing he’d heard was true and that he’d never thought that Jihoon’s previous mistakes needed to be ‘made even’. 

“Jihoon, please, listen to me,” Soonyoung tried, his voice cracking as he tried not to break down at seeing his Jihoon upset, “None of that is true. I want you, I still want you, so badly. Why are you saying these things? I- I wanted to tell you sooner, but-” Jihoon drew in a shaky breath and Soonyoung shook his head, “They want me to graduate early. I’ve been given extra hours and they think I can take the exam a year before everyone else. If I graduate early, it means I can get us an apartment, a place for you to come home to once you finish your courses. I should’ve told you sooner, but every night, I come home so tired and I can hardly manage to eat dinner before falling asleep. I’m doing this for us, Jihoon, look- see I even have the early graduation form in my bag.” Soonyoung was rushing now, letting go of Jihoon’s arms and rifling through his bag, searching through stacks of folders and profiles to find the confirmation slip.

“Soonyoung, please, don’t lie to me anymore.” Jihoon said quietly, his voice thin and shaky and Soonyoung was rushing back with the paper.

“I’m not lying, here, look. Please, just believe me, Jihoon. I’m telling you the truth.” Soonyoung was almost begging now and Jihoon stared up at him with glassy eyes as he took the paper into his hands. Soonyoung nodded down to it, urging him to read it. Jihoon stepped back and sat down on the bed. There was a long silence before Jihoon looked back at Soonyoung again, kneeling between his thighs as Jihoon scanned the letter.

“You weren’t lying?” Jihoon whispered, his voice raw and Soonyoung knew for a fact that he was the only person to ever see Jihoon like this. Soonyoung shook his head, confirming Jihoon’s statement and resting a hand on his face, brushing the tears away with his thumb.

“I’m not lying. I can’t even bring myself to make up white lies anymore.” He paused a moment, shuffling impossibly closer and holding Jihoon’s face with both hands, “I know you wanted to say it first, but- I-I love you. I’m in love with you and I don’t know how I’d have lived if you had of left this evening. It breaks my heart to see you upset and every fibre of my being is on red alert now, I want to make you happy and ruin anyone who stands in my way of that. Jihoon, you are my first, please be my last?” Soonyoung was crying now, his body convulsing as he bit back sobs, swallowing them down in an attempt at recovering. Jihoon stared at him a moment longer, eyes filling again and he finally nodded, dropping the paper and launching himself into Soonyoung’s arms, wrapping his arms around his neck as he sank to the floor with him. Soonyoung sighed out in relief, tears streaming down his face as Jihoon sobbed into his shoulder, his body shaking from the pent up emotions.

“I-I’m sorry I should’ve believed you a-and now everything’s a-a mess and-  _ fuck _ \- Soonyoung, I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.” Jihoon sobbed. He was sure he’d never cried like this before and Soonyoung’s heart was aching at hearing his voice crack, feeling his small body shake and watching as he fell apart from his very core.

“Shh, It’s okay, don’t strain yourself, baby.” Soonyoung hushed, wrapping his arms tighter around him and tangling a hand in his hair, “It’s okay, you’re okay. I’m here.” Jihoon was sobbing harder and now every bad thing in his life seemed to be hitting him at once. He couldn’t bring himself to stop crying, now that he’d started, there seemed to be no end. Soonyoung pulled him into his lap and lifted him, wrapping his legs around his waist. He was lucky Jihoon was so tiny, in fact, that was one of Soonyoung’s favourite things about him. It was a surprise that he’d found someone smaller and cuter than himself, although, Jihoon denied the ‘cute’ part. He advanced to their bedroom, noticing the bags in their doorway, swallowing down a sob,

“I’m so scared, I don’t know what I’m doing anymore, Young-ah. You’re the only thing I’m sure of and that’s terrifying to me.” Jihoon muttered into his neck, sniffing as he tightened his arms around Soonyoung’s neck, not letting him leave as he lay him down in bed. 

“You don’t have to be afraid, Jihoon. If I’m the only thing you’re sure of, then you have nothing else to lose, just stay with me. That’s all I ask.” Soonyoung replied quietly, kissing his forehead and smiling as Jihoon slowly released his grip around his shoulders. Soonyoung was quick to tear his and Jihoon’s shirts over their heads, grabbing two sweaters from his drawers and sliding Jihoon’s arms into one. He moved to unzip his jeans next, then making to Jihoon’s and pulling them over his ankles, their clothes discarded around the room as Soonyoung pulled him down under the covers onto his chest.

“I’ll stay with you, I promise, Soonyoung.” Jihoon whispered, his voice croaky and harsh in the quiet of their bedroom. That was right, ‘their’ bedroom sounded so much nicer than just ‘Soonyoung’s’, “I’m so proud of you. I can’t believe they’re letting you graduate a year earlier, I’m so proud of you.” He thought aloud, his sobs softening for a moment as Soonyoung held him into his chest, pressing his face into Jihoon’s soft hair and kissing the crown of his head repeatedly. 

“Thank you, baby, and I’m sorry. I should’ve told you sooner, it was unfair of me to let you think all these things.” Soonyoung replied, massaging a hand down Jihoon’s back and letting Jihoon slip his hand under his sweater, resting his palm against his bare chest. Jihoon had always been comforted by skin-to-skin contact, Soonyoung had always found it cute. It had become a silent plea for affection at times, a way to tell Soonyoung that he was anxious or upset, but couldn’t voice it. Most nights, Soonyoung fell asleep first, but whenever he felt Jihoon’s fingers on his bare skin- his chest, shoulders, his collarbones, or down to his abdomen, resting on his waist or hip bones- he always woke up. He’d pull Jihoon in closer and let him touch him however he liked, their legs intertwined or his fingers trailing his skin. It only really occurred to him that this was Jihoon’s coping mechanism when he started working alongside the psychiatrists.

“I should stop listening to what people have to say, shouldn’t I.” Jihoon said decisively, his fingers tracing patterns on Soonyoung’s chest.

“What did they say?” Soonyoung asked, not even bothering to ask who had said what. He knew that the other students in their halls had never really liked students from other departments, but he also knew that Jihoon didn’t give two shits about what people thought. Until now, that was. 

“That you’d found someone else.” Jihoon said solemnly, his eyes growing tired, but his voice steadier now, “That you didn’t want me anymore.” Soonyoung felt a silent tear trickle down his cheek. If this was hurting him to hear, then he couldn’t imagine how much more it would’ve hurt to be on the receiving end of it all. He pulled him closer in his arms and had the sudden feeling of not wanting to ever let him go. If they could simply stay like this forever, life would be fine. Jihoon would get hurt if they left this exact position.

“You are the only thing I want in this life.” He mumbled sleepily, eyes drifting as he felt his whole chest cave at how much he loved Jihoon, “As long as you’re with me, I swear, I won’t ask for anything more.” He added sincerely. Jihoon’s hand trailed to his nipple, pressing on between his thumb and forefinger then the other. He ran his thumb over the raised, tender skin, Soonyoung trying not to moan at the sensation. He’d always had a thing for Jihoon teasing his chest, biting and pinching and scratching so he had marks that stayed there for days.

“I love you, Soonyoung.” He uttered quietly and Soonyoung kissed him slowly, drawing him in against his body and teasing his tongue across his bottom lip.

“Fuck,” Soonyoung whispered as they pulled apart, “I always wondered how that would sound coming from your lips. It tastes just as good.” He rushed, pulling Jihoon back in to kiss him firmly.

 

  * ••••



 

_ It was a year into their relationship. Jihoon held Soonyoung’s hand. Soonyoung smiled. Neither of them spoke about that argument and since then they hadn’t argued much, until Jihoon witnessed something he wished he hadn’t. Soonyoung was popular, Jihoon wasn’t so much. This made things difficult when they ate together at lunch breaks or met at coffee shops between lessons or shifts. Soonyoung had been working night shifts the majority of the previous week, meaning he was free to meet Jihoon for lunch, drive him to and from classes and spend a lot of his time with him. This was all good and well for Jihoon, until it came to evenings and he’d have to fall asleep alone, he supposed that was how it’d be for Soonyoung during his school hours as well, but it just seemed eerier at night. Jihoon had brought it up whilst they were having coffee that day and Soonyoung smiled at him softly and reached for his hand across the table, _

_ “I’m sorry, love, It’ll be back to normal soon. We can go out for dinner then.” Soonyoung tried to brighten, but Jihoon felt like he had to fake smile at that. In Jihoon’s head, he didn’t see himself as a sex addict, but for someone so little, his testosterone levels were probably a little too high. He wondered if Soonyoung was starting to get withdrawal symptoms as well, they hadn’t done anything past making out for well over a month now and it was normal for Jihoon to be getting impatient, right? Jihoon pushed the thought to the back of his mind as a male student approached their table, clearly looking for Soonyoung. Jihoon quickly withdrew his hand and fixed his eyes on the table. _

_ “Soonyoung! How are you? Will you be joining the others at the party tonight?” The boy spoke and as Jihoon looked up at him, he recognised him as someone by the name of Minsu, that was his name, he was sure. _

_ “Ah, well, I- I still have-” Soonyoung began, stumbling over his words and avoiding Minsu’s gaze. Jihoon frowned and decided to jump in for him, _

_ “He’s working the night shift tonight.” He explained, sipping at his coffee and Minsu frowned in response. Soonyoung inhaled sharply, _

_ “We’re not allowed to do night shifts anymore, we haven’t been allowed to do them for well over a month now. Especially after Taemi mixed up that old lady’s drugs and almost poisoned her to death. Hey, Jihoon isn’t it? Do you want to come as well? There’ll be plenty of booze.” There was silence for a moment and Minsu seemed to shift on his feet, looking between them both. Jihoon held Soonyoung’s gaze, _

_ “Sorry, I’ve got an early class tomorrow, but I’m sure Soonyoung will come.” Jihoon said shortly, then without another word, got up and left. _

 

  * _••••_



 

Jihoon’s possessions were back in place and after a week- yes, a week, Jihoon was more fragile than he looked- he’d begun leaving the apartment again. Soonyoung had done something and Jihoon hadn’t asked, but the second day he was walking to lessons, the very person who’d told him all those things on the staircase, was on crutches and his nose looked like it might’ve been broken. He flinched when he saw Jihoon. 

 

When Soonyoung got home that evening, Jihoon was sitting in bed, supposedly studying, but a raging boner was quite the distraction from business affairs. 

“Baby?” Soonyoung called and Jihoon was on his feet, running towards his voice. Soonyoung met him in the living room with a smile, eyeing his attire and pulling him into a hug. Jihoon had gotten restless, meaning the moment he got home, he was changing into a loose crop-top and stripping down to his boxers. Not only did this give Soonyoung the perfect view of his belly button piercing, but the perfect chance to run his hands over the toned curves of his abdomen. It was getting warmer recently, by no means warm enough to walk around in crop-tops and boxers, but warmer than it had been. 

“Young-ah, how was your day?” Jihoon asked brightly, keeping his arms wrapped around his waist and letting Soonyoung pepper his face with kisses. 

“Mh, tiring,” He groaned, kicking his shoes off and guiding Jihoon back to their bedroom where he was studying, “You’re in a good mood.” He commented, his hands still on Jihoon’s bare waist and Jihoon knew he had no intention of removing them. Jihoon hummed at him, sitting down on the bed before Soonyoung began pulling him into his lap, clearing the study papers so he could continue kissing Jihoon’s exposed skin. 

“Yeah, I tend to get that way when I find out my boyfriend broke someone’s nose for me- oh- and potentially their leg.” Jihoon shrugged, smiling coyly and leaning into Soonyoung’s mouth, currently nipping at his abdomen and denying nothing.

“Well, I know how the human body is put together, so I know very well how to take it apart.” Soonyoung smirked, finally sliding back up his body as he pushed him back down against the mattress, capturing his lips and sucking on them until they were swollen and red. 

“That’s hot.” Jihoon hummed, cradling Soonyoung's neck as he nipped down his body, lifting his top up but not pulling it over his head. Jihoon knew how much he loved this very top. Soonyoung shifted, caging Jihoon’s body beneath him and kissing up his stomach. 

“Usually I get a text when you’re in a mood, why not today?” Soonyoung commented, unable to count the number of times he’d been sent dick pics or videos from Jihoon, only to accidentally open them in public. There was no denying that Jihoon was in a mood and it was curious that he hadn’t sent something, but what with Soonyoung graduating early, he hadn’t wanted to disturb him. 

“You’re busy and, besides, a patient might see it and that is not what I’m here for.” Jihoon shrugged, lifting his hips so Soonyoung could shuffle his boxers off, leaving the crop-top on. 

“I’m never to busy for you, baby.” Soonyoung mumbled into his hip bone, “I would’ve tried to get off work sooner if you had of let me know.” He added but Jihoon was giggling and shaking his head. 

“No, it’s a hardon not our first born. I can wait.” Jihoon smiled down at him, trying to buck his hips up into Soonyoung’s mouth but missing every time. In all fairness, Soonyoung was moving away whenever he did so. 

“Yes, but there’s such a thing as lying.” Soonyoung said softly, lapping at Jihoon’s cock from the base up to the head and back down again. It was kitten licks at first but Jihoon was clearly getting impatient, he was quickly devoured in one, swallowed down into Soonyoung’s throat. Jihoon choked out a moan, holding Soonyoung’s head there for a moment before letting him pull up. 

“I thought you didn’t lie.” Jihoon mumbled once Soonyoung pulled off, catching his breath. 

“Correction, I don’t lie to you.” Soonyoung winked, taking him down his throat again, lips touching at the base, his nose brushing the well-kept hair. Jihoon moaned out and that was the exact noise Soonyoung was thriving off of. 

“Oh  _ God _ , I think I forgot how much I missed this.” He hummed in the back of his throat, twining his fingers into Soonyoung’s hair again. He liked it this colour, bright colours always had suited him and having it dyed somewhere between a neon red and orange had him utterly gone for. Come to think of it, Jihoon wondered how he’d got away with it at uni, but seeing as he was graduating early, he probably had a few advantages. Like breaking people’s noses and dying his hair. 

“Maybe I shouldn’t graduate early, maybe I should just come home and see you instead of working overtime.” Soonyoung whispered against Jihoon’s cock, mouthing at the length and licking stripes along his slit. They both knew he was joking, that he couldn’t pass up on this opportunity and wouldn’t dare disappoint himself nor his family to have wild sex with his boyfriend ‘til the sun rose, but the sentiment was nice. 

“Uh, yes,” Jihoon moaned out, “maybe then I’d get the chance to show you what I bought the other week.” Soonyoung pulled back, hands still either side of Jihoon’s waist, but the words he’d uttered hadn’t yet made it through to his conscience and he began bucking his hips to get Soonyoung’s attention back. 

“What did you buy?” Soonyoung asked, his voice a mix of determination, impatience and arousal. 

“Hm?” Jihoon hummed, trying to snake his own hand down his body to touch himself instead now. His head was thrown back and his eyes were closed, but Soonyoung was leaning up over his body, gripping at his chin and making him open his eyes. 

“What did you buy, Jihoon?” Soonyoung pressed and there it was, Jihoon’s mind clicked back into gear and he shied away. 

“Oh, n-no nothing- it’s nothi-” Jihoon began but Soonyoung was leaning down to bite a stark, purpling mark against his collarbone. That was one thing that really turned Jihoon on, but also really got him mad. He wasn’t a great wearer of makeup and that meant that his next options were scarves and turtlenecks and neither of those things seemed fashionable in mid-spring. 

“Fine, well, you can get yourself off then.” Soonyoung shrugged, pulling away from him and climbing off their bed. To Jihoon’s shock, Soonyoung left their bedroom without another word and headed to the kitchen, running the tap to begin washing up and getting ready to cook them both dinner. 

“H-hey- What the fuck, Soonyoung?” Jihoon yelled from their bedroom and Soonyoung couldn’t help but smirk, “Oh my God, I cannot believe you!” And a sudden stomping of feet came, crossing towards him in the kitchen. Jihoon was going to get his own back, whether Soonyoung liked it or not. 

“Hm, you deny me something, I have every right to move on from the situation. Wasn’t that in your lectures…” Soonyoung began rambling but Jihoon was dropping to his knees, tearing his pants down and taking his semi-hard cock into his mouth. He didn’t give a shit. Soonyoung wasn’t getting everything, he was going to get a taste and then Jihoon would leave to go and get himself off. Soonyoung gripped the countertop with white knuckles, his hands still covered in suds as he tried to stable himself, “Jihoon, I’m warning you.” He said firmly but Jihoon had the audacity to look up at him with those beautiful soft, innocent eyes.  _ Damned brat.  _

“Mh, like I warned you not to push it with the purchase I made the other week, but here we are.” Jihoon shot out as he jerked Soonyoung off, drooling over his cock for lubrication. Soonyoung groaned, right from his chest and Jihoon could tell that he was giving in. 

“You have until I count to five to go back to your room and find me what you bought.” Soonyoung grit out, voice low and quiet and Jihoon should know he was playing a dangerous game, but that didn’t make it any less fun, “One,”- Jihoon  licked up the underside of his cock- “Two,”- His tongue found his slit, not breaking the eye contact- “Three,”- Soonyoung clenched his fingers into the countertop- “Four,”- Jihoon took him down to the back of his throat- “Five, time’s up, Jihoon.” Soonyoung’s voice sounded the slightest bit shaky, but Jihoon wasn’t pulling away. It was a solid moment before Soonyoung moved and Jihoon smirked around a mouth full of cock, no real threat in the count down until Soonyoung suddenly flickered into action, gripping a handful of Jihoon’s hair roughly and thrusting into his mouth. Jihoon would’ve probably been able to manage it if he had of been prepared for it, but he wasn’t and he found himself gagging, his throat spasming around Soonyoung’s cock and fulling tighter as his eyes watered, pushing the urge to vomit as far away from his thoughts as he could. He shut his eyes, a tear slipping between his lashes and Soonyoung was not even apologetic. Another few harsh thrusts and Soonyoung was pulling back, a hand gripping Jihoon’s hair harshly, “So, are you going to do as I say now? Or are we asking for punishments tonight?” Jihoon was a wreck. His eyes were red and tear tracks were tearing down his face, falling towards pink, swollen lips. He looked so utterly fucked out, so used and exhausted and Soonyoung hadn’t even started with him yet.

“What would you prefer,” He asked breathlessly, pausing as he looked up, his eyes screaming ‘sex’, “Daddy?” He added and Soonyoung was inhaling a moment. They hadn’t used that name since they’d been back together and hearing from Jihoon’s lips was more of a surprise when he said it like he wanted to  _ taste _ the word. 

“Is there lube in here?” Soonyoung asked quickly, pulling Jihoon to his feet by his hair and noticing the bruises blossoming on his knees. Jihoon shook his head and Soonyoung was dragging him back to their bedroom by the wrist, unforgiving as Jihoon’s knees locked up for a moment.

“Wait,” Jihoon called, his voice wrecked from strained overuse, “It’s in here, the thing I bought is in this room. If you really want it, then you’ll find it.” He tested and Soonyoung was dropping his wrist and throwing him onto the bed, pushing him back with a rough shove. He leant down, leaning over and nipping his neck and chest, teasing the skin and turning it purple.

“You think you’re in control, baby, but I guess you’ll have to see. You’re not the only one who made a purchase recently.” That was a curveball. Jihoon wasn’t expecting that for one minute. Soonyoung was kissing him hard, distracting him enough to slide his hand up Jihoon’s right arm and tie it to the metal bed post. His skill was impressive, seeing as he was working with his eyes partially shut and didn’t have any particularly strong restraints at hand. Yes, that was right, Jihoon’s business tie would keep his hands from straying too far. That was, in fact, one of Soonyoung’s biggest pitfalls every morning- waking up to see Jihoon changing into his tight fitting suits, his ass perfectly shaped, his collar sat perfectly stark against his throat. 

“You got me something?” Jihoon said, pulling away from the kiss in excitement, making to weave his hand into Soonyoung’s hair only for his arm to be stopped by the restraint. A sly smile crept onto his face and Soonyoung knew that even with restraints, Jihoon still had his control.

“I got you a few things, actually.” Soonyoung said darkly and it was funny knowing that the situation had turned out so different from what he’d originally wanted, but this, this was so much better. He pulled away, fumbling through a pile of clothes beside their bed and tying Jihoon’s left wrist up to the other headpost with a darker tie. When Soonyoung had bought his presents, he’d actually been hoping that they’d be used the night he announced his early graduation, maybe Jihoon would like more than one surprise in one night, it had seemed like a good plan. He’d ordered them next day delivery for them to arrive on a day he was working a night shift, meaning he’d be home to receive the parcel, but Jihoon wouldn’t. The only flaw in his plan had been recently, when he’d had to spill his news a little prematurely and suddenly there wasn’t a specific occasion to gift them. 

“And if I want to touch you?” Jihoon questioned, knocking Soonyoung from his thoughts with a jerk of his head at the restraints.

“If you’re trying to get me to take them off, it’s not going to happen.” Soonyoung said decisively, walking away from the bed for a moment, collecting a cardboard box from somewhere in their closet. As he turned around, he was graced with the perfect view of Jihoon. His eyes were shut, his teeth clamped around his bottom lip and he seemed to be pulling from the restraints almost as if he was already being touched, already desperate and wanting. His crop-top was still covering the upper part of his chest, but one side had been pushed out of place from where Soonyoung had reached to tie his restraints, the rest of his body bare and pulsing as he thrashed his hips, groaning quietly. It was clear that if Soonyoung wasn’t going to pleasure him, then Jihoon would do it himself and tease him whilst he did so. He pulled the first item from it’s packaging and approached Jihoon silently, his eyes still shut and his body vulnerable and unaware. One, two and three seconds were all it took for Jihoon to notice his presence, but he refused to open his eyes. Soonyoung turned the vibrator on, pressing it between his legs and against his balls.

“F-fuck-” He groaned out in response and Soonyoung was smirking, looking up to meet his eyes, being met with Jihoon’s sex-glazed gaze, “Sh-shit, Soonyoung- _ ahh! _ ” He bucked his hips, the vibrator falling from it’s position, but Soonyoung wasn’t moving to fix it. 

“Now, will you tell me where I might go about finding your purchase or will I need to be unforgiving?” Soonyoung reiterated his words from earlier, placing his box back on the floor and tracing a light index finger down Jihoon’s body. He squirmed in response and Soonyoung scoffed, slipping his cock to Jihoon’s lips and and sliding his jeans and boxers off completely. Jihoon moaned out and Soonyoung was taking him by the jaw, dragging his cock over his lip then pushing in harshly, watching as Jihoon’s body spasmed at the sudden intrusion. It was inevitable, but Jihoon still found his body shaking at the impact, his hips rolling against the vibrator in a failed attempt at gaining something to relieve himself. Jihoon took him for a while, sucking him slowly and letting Soonyoung set the pace, but pulling away when he ran out of breath, the angle difficult as he strained his neck to the side. 

“Think very hard, Soonyoung, where might I keep something like this?” Jihoon got out through stuttered breaths, his eyes still traced on Soonyoung’s cock, licking at the head a few moments before Soonyoung turned away in a hurry. He rushed to the ensuite bathroom and even from where Jihoon was standing, he could hear him rifling through the cupboards and drawers, searching between the towels and where they kept the lube and condoms. Nothing. Absolutely nothing unusual, apart from the cherry lube he’d added to the cupboard this week, everything was as he’d left it. 

“Where is it, Jihoon?” Soonyoung said gruffly, his voice catching and bouncing off the walls. If Jihoon didn’t know him the way he did, then he might’ve been scared, intimidated at the least, for Soonyoung was someone else when he lost his temper. Jihoon hummed to himself, turning his hips back down to try and shift his body to the vibrator that seemed to have shifted yet again. Soonyoung appeared back in the doorway, a dirty smirk on his face, a contrast from his voice and for a heartstopping moment, Jihoon wondered if he hadn’t put it back in the usual place, “Jihoon, so far you have denied me, gone against my wishes and worked me up to a new point of sexual frustration. At the very least, you won’t be orgasming tonight, so you better start talking.” Soonyoung said with a cock of his head and Jihoon’s hips stuttered to a stop. He froze, eyes staring up at him and then following his movements as he bent down to the box again, this time pulling out a cock ring. Jihoon had royally ucked up this time around. Soonyoung was ruthless and it was stupid to have underestimated him. Jihoon might have to wear it for the rest of his life if he weren’t good. Soonyoung slid the cock ring down his length, clasping it tighter and reaching for his phone on the nightstand.

“What are you d- _Ahh! Young-ah- fuck!_ ” Jihoon cut himself off and that was when he realised how far he’d gone. He’d pushed all of Soonyoung’s buttons and Soonyoung was going to _ruin_ _him_. He cried out, bucking up into thin air and twisting his body in frustration. Soonyoung had thought it’d be a mediocre purchase, an item they didn’t use often, but a vibrating cock ring did some sort of wonders and if this was how Jihoon would react, he’d be using this one outside the bedroom as well.

“Start talking, Jihoon.” Soonyoung grit out, turning the vibrations down to a steady hum that had Jihoon wanting more, working him up slowly and painfully. He thrashed his head to the side, heels digging into the mattress and Soonyoung could see he’d been crying again, face streaming and voice broken as he pulled it together enough to form a sentence,

“T-the vanity-  _ ngh- _ ” He cut off into a groan, his mouth shaking now as he tried to steady his words, “B-bottom left.” He nodded towards the drawer he’d put it in and Soonyoung was nodding slowly, dragging the vibrations up on his phone and smirking to himself as Jihoon responded. 

“Curious that you keep it with your piercings,” Soonyoung commented and it was a moment before he registered what exactly it was that he should’ve been looking for, “I thought it was just one.” He commented, taking the two toys from the drawer with a smirk. He wondered when Jihoon had gotten this kinky, but he was pretty sure it was his fault that he got like this. 

“I- I got the beads a while ago.” Jihoon stuttered out, his thighs shaking and Soonyoung didn’t look the least bit fazed by his obvious desperation. Soonyoung turned both objects over in his hands, sitting beside Jihoon on their bed.

“But you left out that fun little attribute when we got back together, yes?” Soonyoung question, lazily running a hand over Jihoon’s cock, absentmindedly, as he observed the toys. The first toy, the one Jihoon had yet to let Jihoon use from when they got back together, was a set of anal beads. It wasn’t a short string, maybe 15 centimetres worth of clear silicone, a ring at the base where the largest bead ended. ‘Largest’ was a tough word to use, seeing as they weren’t all that grand, the biggest maybe the size of a golf ball. 

“I- I wanted to surprise you.” Jihoon choked out and Soonyoung could understand that mentality. Originally, Jihoon had planned to insert them one evening and let Soonyoung play, then they could move onto better things, much like his second purchase- in his opinion. An ass-plug. The way Jihoon saw it was that this could go one of two ways- Soonyoung left it in for a day, Jihoon stretched and ready for him when he got home, or, Soonyoung came inside him, plugging him and left it within him so Jihoon could feel him all day. Jihoon had hoped for the latter, but really, he kept his options open.

“And this was your new purchase?” Soonyoung held up the black ass-plug, tapping the vibrations down on his phone so Jihoon could hold a proper conversation with him. Jihoon nodded, swallowing roughly and breathing heavily as his hips calmed from their compulsive wriggling. 

“Y-yeah, I wanted to surprise you when you got him from classes.” Jihoon said, a little less breathless now, his head spinning as he watched Soonyoung run his long, slender fingers over both toys. He’d never wanted so many things in his ass at once.

“Hm, you know me too well.” Soonyoung hummed in approval and Jihoon barely held back his smile, “However, that doesn’t change the fact that you’ve been naughty this evening.” He switched his gaze up to Jihoon’s, his eyes cold and firm, unblinking as he observed his body. Jihoon groaned out, watching carefully as Soonyoung leant over to place his additions to the nightstand.

“Will you let me use them for you sometime?” Jihoon asked, wondering if this was Soonyoung confiscating them, but his eyes said something differently.

“Maybe. We’ll have to see if you’re good.” Soonyoung shuffled back down the bed, fiddling with the cock ring so it sat nicely and shuffling the vibrator back between his thighs. Then he had another thought. He leant back up the bed to swipe the anal beads, grabbing a bottle of lube that he’d brought in from the bathroom earlier. He lubed his fingers up and didn’t hesitate at pushing the beads into him.

“S-Soonyoung- s-slowly,  _ please _ .” Jihoon moaned out and, had Soonyoung been feeling kind, he would’ve obliged, but he wasn’t and he sped up the push of the beads. 

“Only good boys get what they want, Jihoon. You should know that by now.” Soonyoung said darkly and Jihoon groaned out at that, trying his best to relax, but Soonyoung was pressing in harder, making his stomach muscles tense up as he pushed the final one in. The ring of silicone hung at his ass and Soonyoung eyed his handiwork, pressing an index finger into him to confirm it was settled deeper in him. He stepped back, wiping his lubed fingers on Jihoon’s chest and grabbing his phone from the nightstand, “I have some work to do, I’ll be back when you’re close.” Soonyoung nodded and Jihoon was staring after him in shock.

“A- are you- wait! Wait,  _ Young-ah, please. _ ” But Soonyoung was smirking, leaving the bedroom door open and picking his gold-rimmed glasses up off the kitchen counter.

 

  * ••••



 

_ Jihoon didn’t like to talk thing out, he didn’t see the point when you could angrily fuck things out and actually enjoy the resolve. Any small arguments that had come to be in the past year, had simply ended with them fucking things out and one of them saying they’d make a compromise in the aftermath. It was a solid plan and Jihoon thought it appropriate for almost every situation they’d been in so far, even if they did have to work with giving head in the university bathrooms between lessons. It was better than dragging things out and fighting for days and he knew that if he put Soonyoung in that position it’d only make things more difficult. _

_ Therefore, when Soonyoung arrived home after Jihoon had left the cafe, he found Jihoon in their bedroom, naked with his eyes closed and his hand slowly tugging the length of his cock. His head was thrown back and Soonyoung almost couldn’t believe the sight. In all honesty, he’d expected Jihoon to be out of the apartment, back in his own dorm room without leaving a note, but there he was humming in the back of his throat, looking utterly sinful. There wasn’t a possibility that Jihoon hadn’t heard Soonyoung come in and that made things only more sinful, as if he was putting on a show for him. He found himself walking towards the bed, crawling up on his stomach to sit between Jihoon’s thighs and take his cock into his mouth. _

_ “Mh fuck,” He mumbled, dropping his hand and letting Soonyoung continue. Jihoon was whining in a few minutes and Soonyoung knew this was Jihoon’s way of fighting, but why did it always feel so good? He pulled off and Jihoon cried out, so close to his release, but Soonyoung was stripping himself of his jeans and pants, not even bothering with his t-shirt as he reached for the lube on the nightstand.  _

_ “I know you should be angry with me, but do as I say and turn over.” Soonyoung ordered and Jihoon was flipping onto his hands and knees, groaning as he felt the pull on his hips and a slick finger pressing into him. _

_ “You-you fucking lied to me,” Jihoon gasped out as Soonyoung curled his finger, “You said you were working night shifts,” Soonyoung prepped a second finger and pushed in firmly, Jihoon yelping, “S-so where were you? A-all those nights, where w-were you?” Soonyoung scissored his fingers, letting Jihoon say what he wanted and pressing a little too roughly when his voice rose, “You- you knew how much I hated being on my own here, s-so where were you? Why didn’t you ma-ke time for me?” He choked out and Soonyoung was pushing a third finger into him, rough and sharp and Jihoon was by no means prepped or ready enough.  _

_ “You never questioned it, so I never told you.” Soonyoung said firmly, flipping Jihoon back over and watching as he bounced on the mattress. He tore a condom open and slicked himself up, “So, why are you asking now you know I wasn’t at work?” He knew it was a stupid question, he knew he should just come clean, but he couldn’t help riling him up. Somehow, he couldn’t tell Jihoon what was really going on, he wasn’t ready for this sort of thing. The same way that Jihoon couldn’t deal with commitment, Soonyoung couldn’t deal with exposing himself. Jihoon pushed himself up, leaning on his hands as he faced Soonyoung, a hair’s breadth apart. And never in Soonyoung’s life did he think that Jihoon would have the nerve, but he was leaning back, slapping him in the face and shuffling off the bed. _

_ “You’re a fucking asshole, Soonyoung.” Jihoon grit out, tearing his sweatpants and t-shirt on and pulling a pre-packed bag over his shoulder, “I hope he’s fucking worth it, whoever it is.” He slammed the door shut and Soonyoung was silent, not even a moment to get his mouth to move. The front door slamming rang through the apartment and Soonyoung fell to the sheets and sobbed. _

 

  * ••••



 

Twenty minutes. It had been twenty minutes of Jihoon whining and moaning and crying out for Soonyoung whilst he studied in the kitchen, changing the vibrations every few minutes to give him some variation. Twenty minutes and Jihoon was begging, crying and begging, to be specific. 

“Young-ah, please,  _ please _ . I’ll do anything, j-just take it  _ off _ .” That was Jihoon’s most common phrase from the past twenty minutes and, in a strange sort of way, Soonyoung found it was almost endearing, “Let me cum,  _ please, please, please _ .” Was another common phrase and little by little the words came more wrecked around the edges, gritty and broken in his throat, until he was barely croaking out his moans and that was when Soonyoung appeared in the doorway. 

“Would you like some help, baby?” He asked and Jihoon almost thought he’d dropped it and was going to fuck him nicely, forget about his teasing and let him cum. He was so far from wrong. Jihoon nodded frantically in answer the question, moaning out as Soonyoung came to sit at the foot of the bed between his spread thighs. 

“Please, daddy, please let me cum.” Jihoon croaked and there it was again- the pet name that he’d been using to try and entice Soonyoung into the bedroom, to help him get off, to make him give in.

“I know, baby, I know.” Soonyoung cooed, keeping up the act and slowly pulling the anal beads from him, reaching for the lube to pour over Jihoon’s cock. He placed the beads aside and leant over him to attack his chest and nipples, slowly spreading the lubricant down his length and pumping him slowly.

“Pl-please, take it off,  _ please daddy _ .” Jihoon begged again and Soonyoung was smiling into his skin, hiding his face with his hair and quickening his hand to jerk Jihoon off at a faster pace than his body could manage. That was the exact moment that it clicked- Soonyoung was going to play him like this  _ all evening _ . 

“Have you learnt your lesson?” Soonyoung grit into his chest and Jihoon was arching up into his body, his mouth, desperate for that little bit more. 

“Yes, yes, I’m sorry. I’ve learnt my lesson, I promise.” Jihoon squeaked out, his voice several tones higher and peaking to a new volume now. Soonyoung knew he was about to cum, two more strokes and-

“Well, I wasn’t impressed with you this afternoon.” Soonyoung removed his hand, edging Jihoon into a sobbing mess. He was really crying now, tears streaming down his face as his begs and pleads became muffled into noise, “You’re not getting what you want until you’re good. Show me you can make up for it and I’ll consider your orgasm, Jihoon.” Soonyoung said sternly and as much as Jihoon was loving this, his urge to cum was so strong that his body began to shake and he lost feeling in his arms.

“What d-do I need to do? I’ll do anything, tell me.” Jihoon begged, his throat raw and it looked like it was becoming a strain to talk, painful to get the words out, “Please, I’ll be good, so good, just tell me what you need.” He tried again, circling his hips into the mattress and Soonyoung was smirking down at him, moving off the bed and disappearing back into the kitchen. 

 

Thirty-five minutes this time. Instead of the previous twenty minutes, Soonyoung appeared again after thirty-five minutes. Jihoon was well and truly wrecked now and Soonyoung knew for a fact that he couldn’t carry this on much longer. He approached Jihoon, watching as his eyes closed and opened slowly, trying his best to focus on the figure in front of him. At some point he was pretty sure he’d passed out, but he couldn’t be sure. Soonyoung was untying the restraints the moment he saw him, pulling him into a kiss and climbing over him as to let him lie back. The feeling was completely gone in Jihoon’s fingers and his thighs had started feeling a little numb. He tried to reach for Soonyoung’s neck, to tangle his fingers into his bright hair, but his hands failed him, falling back to the mattress beside him. Soonyoung continued kissing him slowly, sensually, distracting from the fact he was taking the ring from Jihoon’s cock, the vibrations fading. He moaned out, finally finding the strength in his arms to rest a hand on Soonyoung’s chest, turning his head from Soonyoung to look down between them, watching as he carefully slid the ring off of him, tossing it aside. 

“Okay?” Soonyoung mumbled the question into his neck, licking and sucking the skin of his pulse and jugular and all the way down to his navel. 

“Mh, y-yeah, just fuck me already.” Jihoon asked and the act was dropped between them. Jihoon could ask now and Soonyoung would oblige. He was too far past the point of no return.

“Okay, just stay still for me, alright?” Soonyoung said softly, sucking his ear lobe into his mouth and lapping over his piercings. He leant back a moment later, swiping the lube and pouring it over his fingers, pushing two fingers at Jihoon’s entrance and prepping him the rest of the way. As much as Jihoon usually loved this part and enjoyed taking it slowly, Soonyoung knew that he was too far into this to properly enjoy it. It wasn’t long before Soonyoung was pushing into him, Jihoon moaning notoriously underneath him as he tried his best to calm him. Merely three thrusts in had Jihoon screaming,

“S-Soonyoung, I’m going to cum-  _ fuck _ .” Jihoon moaned out and Soonyoung was smiling, nodding his understanding and reaching between them to begin jerking at Jihoon’s length, but he was pushing his hand away, pulling him down to kiss him harshly.

“Cum for me, baby.” Soonyoung mumbled against his lips and in any other situation, Jihoon would’ve been painfully embarrassed to cum so soon, but Soonyoung had put his body through so much and now he could  _ have what he wanted. _ Soonyoung could count the times Jihoon had cum untouched on one hand and every time was more delicious. He really could never tire of it. Jihoon orgasmed, coming hard all over his stomach, thick streaks painting his abdomen and filling his navel, covering his piercing and even reaching his chest. He’d never made so much noise in his life and Soonyoung was thrusting harder now, reaching his high all too quickly after seeing Jihoon cum so hard, hearing his voice reach a pitch that he didn’t know what possible of him. 

“ _ Ah- fuck! _ Soony-  _ fuck- daddy! _ ” The name slipped again and in the mess of Jihoon’s brain he was rolling his eyes at himself, but right now he was moaning and crying out, meeting Soonyoung’s every thrust and breathing heavily. 

“You’re doing amazing, I’m so proud of how much your body can withstand.” Soonyoung praised, kissing his chest and making to pull out as Jihoon came down from his high, but he stopped him.

“Y-you can carry on.” Jihoon spoke, wrecked and exhausted and still coming down from his orgasm. Soonyoung knew it’d overstimulate him and he didn’t know if Jihoon should take anymore. He knew he could, but it didn’t mean that he should just for the sake of getting Soonyoung off.

“Baby, it’s fine, I can-” Soonyoung tried, but Jihoon was moaning around him as he tried to pull his hips back, digging his nails into Soonyoung’s thighs.

“Soonyoung, d-do as I say.” Jihoon persisted, wrapping his arms around his neck to pull him down into another passionate kiss, too much tongue and saliva, but so delicious that Jihoon couldn’t help but lose a part of his sanity from it. Not even a few minutes later, Soonyoung was pulling out, cumming all over Jihoon’s stomach, their release mixed on his stomach and painting his skin. 

“Fuck, baby,  _ so good _ .” Soonyoung moaned, his head thrown back, eyes shut as he jerked himself through the aftershocks. Jihoon’s original plan was to have him cum inside him and plug it until morning, but he knew that he couldn’t take it and Soonyoung would never allow it after all that he’d already been through that evening. Jihoon was whining beneath him, clenching around nothing as he missed the feeling of being filled, but Soonyoung was leaning down and kissing him firmly, his hands mixing their cum together on Jihoon’s chest and it felt so good in such a bad way.

“Oh fuck, Soonyoung.” Jihoon muttered once the pulled apart and he looked down at his chest. Soonyoung hummed, moving back to run to the bathroom and get a damp towel. Neither of them said anything for a while, simply exchanging kisses as Soonyoung cleaned his chest and hips.there was no possible way that Jihoon could’ve managed to get himself to the bathroom in his state and Soonyoung was tired as well. They could shower the following day, right now Jihoon needed to be loved and coddled and kissed until he fell asleep.

“Are you alright, baby?” Soonyoung asked, once he’d dried Jihoon off and pulled a sweater and a pair of cotton sweatpants onto his limp body. He hummed, instantly reaching for Soonyoung as he began changing as well.

“That is the hardest I’ve cum in so long.” He slurred tiredly, making Soonyoung giggle. He pulled the sheets back and slid in to bed beside him, Jihoon was quick to find his way into his arms, slipping a hand under his sweater to touch his skin.

“It wasn’t too much?” Soonyoung said softly, stroking Jihoon’s hair back from his face and looking down at him, watching as he sucked on the second knuckle down his index finger. It had developed as a sleeping habit when he was young and even though he didn’t care for being a ‘little’, it still made him seem like one once they’d finish every time. Soonyoung found it extremely endearing and it had gotten to the point that Jihoon might fall asleep with his mouth wrapped around the knuckle of Soonyoung’s index finger, instead of his own. 

“It wasn’t too much, I promise.” Jihoon confirmed, lips brushing his knuckle, shining with saliva, “I would’ve used my safe word otherwise.” He reassured, letting Soonyoung kiss his head before he wrapped his mouth around the knuckle again. 

“Are you tired?” Soonyoung asked, knowing that he was, but checking anyway. Jihoon hummed a yes around his finger, “Does anywhere hurt?” He asked next and maybe his studies were getting to him a little bit.

“Just my throat, but I’ll be fine.” He replied, Soonyoung shaking his head and twisting their legs together.

“I’ll ask Jisoo to bring your notes over and I’ll call your tutors to let them know you’re sick. I’m working the night shift tomorrow, so we can both sleep in.” Soonyoung said firmly and Jihoon didn’t have the energy to argue about it. He mumbled a ‘thank you’ and curled into Soonyoung’s chest, smiling to himself whenever he felt a kiss being pressed to his head.

 

  * ••••



 

_ Soonyoung had sent message after message and call after call, but two weeks turned to three and Jihoon hadn’t returned. Not even to collect the rest of his things. Soonyoung took on longer shifts and Jihoon started drinking again.  _

_ It was another week later that Soonyoung spotted Jihoon across the campus and made for him, trying his best to compose himself. He was almost beside him when a taller boy came into view, wrapping Jihoon up in his arms and making him smile. He recognised him from the sports department, a popular second year that had everything he wanted right within his reach. Soonyoung paused behind the lockers and observed them for a moment, Jihoon seemed happy. _

_ “Are you coming back to my place?” The taller boy asked and Jihoon smiled up at him, reaching up on tiptoes to kiss his jaw. _

_ “Sure, Yeol-ah.” Jihoon replied softly and if Soonyoung hadn’t have been desperate to hear them both, he would’ve missed it. Chanyeol. That was his name.  _

_ “Good, I just need to go to the library.” Chanyeol replied and Jihoon nodded, a little giggle falling from those pretty lips. Soonyoung turned away and when he looked back, they were gone. He wanted to cry, or scream or punch something. Was he already to late? He began towards the bathrooms, trying to take steadying breaths as he thought through their conversation, he still had a chance, right? Jihoon could still be his, right? He made his way into a bathroom stall and sat down on the lid of the toilet, resting his face in his hands in an attempt at pushing down his tears. The door to the bathrooms sounded again he straightened himself out, trying to compose himself before leaving the stall, but something stopped him. A giggle, high and light and so pretty that it almost made him want to smile. _

_ “We have to be quick, it’s almost lesson change.” Chanyeol’s voice sounded and Soonyoung suddenly felt like he knew something he shouldn’t, that he was in a place he shouldn’t be.  _

_ “Fuck, let us get caught, it’ll be exciting.” Jihoon spoke this time and Soonyoung’s heart dropped to his feet. There was no way he could leave now, no way that he could stay either. He held his breath, the sound of lips on skin and a shuffle of clothing as a stall door clicked shut.  _

_ “Shit, you’re kinkier than I thought.” Chanyeol laughed, low and melodic and Soonyoung wanted nothing more than to drown himself in the toilet. He grit his teeth and closed his eyes. _

_ “I like things that I can’t manage sometimes,” Jihoon spoke with a smirk and the sound of jeans sliding down thighs could suddenly be heard, “Like getting caught and cocks that are much too big for me.” He added and Chanyeol scoffed, Jihoon was on his knees and wet sounds were echoing throughout the bathroom. Soonyoung was going to be sick. Chanyeol moaned out. Jihoon groaned around him. _

_ “Fuck, your mouth is so good.” Chanyeol growled and Soonyoung hated how he could practically see Jihoon’s face in his mindseye. For someone with such a tiny frame, a tiny body and features, Jihoon really was incredible at taking cock. Soonyoung knew he was getting too lucky when he was with Jihoon. The sound of Jihoon’s mouth pulling off of Chanyeol met his ears and for a heartstopping moment he thought they’d finished this all and he could leave, but the sound of soft giggling and a rustle of clothes was apparent again. _

_ “B-but I wanted to taste you.” Jihoon said softly and Chanyeol began breathing a little unevenly, spitting into his hand and running his bigger hands over himself and Jihoon, the drag almost audible.  _

_ “Later, baby, later.” Chanyeol said breathlessly, Jihoon groaning now, his voice higher and whinier than Chanyeol’s and Soonyoung would be lying to himself if he said he didn’t miss it. He knew he shouldn’t be listening, that he should put his headphones in or cover his ears with his hands, but he couldn’t stop. It was a full three minutes of jerking before Chanyeol gave out, moans coming intermittently and uneven as he breathed, kissing along Jihoon’s skin and sucking on his tongue as their mouths met.  _

_ “Fuck- fuck, cum for me, Yeol-ah.” Jihoon whispered breathily and the sound of Chanyeol reaching his orgasm came not too soon after. The next thing that Soonyoung was aware of was Chanyeol’s voice steadying and Jihoon’s rising now. The same wet sound from earlier was back again, doubled this time with Jihoon sucking on Chanyeol’s cum-covered fingers as he finished him off with his mouth. Soonyoung knew how Jihoon sounded when he came, he still remembered. It had been a long time, but it was still the most beautiful sound to him. Jihoon whimpered out, struggling to get Chanyeol’s name out around the fingers in his mouth. He gasped as Chanyeol pulled back and his pants began steadying. There was silence for a few moments and then the bell was ringing and lesson changes began. Chanyeol groaned and another shuffle of tissue and clothing came.  _

_ “Fuck.” Chanyeol said shortly and Jihoon seemed to be kissing his neck now. The latch of their stall sounded and Soonyoung swallowed, desperate to leave, to be alone, to cry. _

_ “Hey, do you mind going ahead and returning my books? I just want to clean myself up.” Jihoon said softly and Chanyeol kissed him again, longer now. _

_ “Of course, baby. I’ll meet you there.” Chanyeol replied, another rustling of clothes and bags and another soft kiss and then the sound of the door shutting behind Chanyeol. Jihoon sighed quietly, his feet walking to the end stall where Soonyoung was. _

_ “I know you’re in there, Young-ah.” Jihoon said firmly and Soonyoung almost yelped. There was no point in denying it and Jihoon was going to get to him no matter what. He stood, unlatching the stall, a dark, sombre expression on his face. He didn’t even feel embarrassed to face Jihoon after hearing him finish in someone else’s mouth. _

_ “I didn’t know how to leave.” Soonyoung explained, looking at the linoleum floor beneath them, “I didn’t want to-to interrupt.” It sounded stupid now he said it aloud. He pulled his bag closer to his shoulder and finally looked up to Jihoon. _

_ “I hope you’re happy.” Jihoon said sharply and Soonyoung’s mind was racing, he wanted to yell or kiss him or do something stupid. _

_ “No, Jihoon, I’m not! I’m so far from happy that it kills me.” Soonyoung yelled and Jihoon inhaled sharply, trying to play it off as a cough, “I’m devastated. Everything hurts, I can’t sleep, I can’t eat, I can’t even go back to my apartment, because your things are still there and it drives me insane. Everything that happened that night, whatever you thought, you were wrong. I wasn’t cheating on you, I was falling for you, how could I cheat? But I see that it’s easier for some of us. Easier to start a new life, find a new boy, fuck a new stranger. A year must not seem long to you, a year must not have meant much and it’s clear to me now that I felt more for you than you ever did for me in that year. So, don’t expect me to be happy, don’t pretend like you’re living the perfect life, Jihoon. You don’t get it, you’ll never get it, but I was so far gone for you that everytime I thought of anyone else it all immediately came back down to you. So, Jihoon, I hope that you’re happy. I hope he treats you better, I hope he loves you more and I hope- to God- that he fucks you how you like it.” Soonyoung was yelling, tears streaming down his face now and Jihoon’s jaw was almost on the floor. He tried his best to hold back his own tears, but seeing Soonyoung cry had him in pieces.  _

_ “If you weren’t cheating on me, then what was it?” Jihoon yelled back, roughly brushing his tears away with the back of his hand. There was silence between them, hot and thick and terrifying to even acknowledge. Then Soonyoung was pulling his shirt up, a long, thick scar, freshly stitched, stretched up his abdomen. _

_ “I’m sick, Jihoon. Very sick.”  _

 

  * ••••



 

Jihoon awoke to voices in the living room and an empty space in bed beside him. He pushed himself up, pulling a hoodie and a pair of sweatpants on and running a hand through his hair. 

“... back to working with Seungcheol. The new place looks really good, you should come by sometime.” Wonwoo was talking as Jihoon entered and the three of them turned to him, smiling softly. Jisoo moved forward, wrapping him up in his arms,

“Jihoon! Was Young-ah too rough last night?” He teased, knowing too well that Jihoon wasn’t the slightest bit sick.

“Shut up.” He croaked out, his voice failing him as it lacked the aggression he’d intended, “When did you guys get here?” Jihoon said, pulling back and following Jisoo into the kitchen where the other two had retreated, the kettle boiling now and the faintest smell of fried things.

“Only about ten minutes ago.” Jisoo replied, Wonwoo instinctively wrapping an arm around his waist as he came closer. Jihoon couldn’t help but smile. 

“They’re staying for movie day with us.” Soonyoung spoke over the sound of sizzling and Jihoon looked back at them with a wide smile.

“Only if you want us to, we can go otherwise.” Wonwoo smiled softly and Jihoon was shaking his head, sipping at the coffee that Soonyoung had thrust into his hands with a kiss to his nose. In all honesty, Wonwoo knew this was a continuation of after-care for Jihoon and he knew that if it was Jisoo, he’d running most things past him, checking if he were okay every five minutes. He didn’t know what Jihoon was like, but he still wanted to give him the option just in case he felt insecure or uncomfortable for any reason. 

“No, I want you to stay. What are we watching?” Jihoon smiled and Wonwoo visibly relaxed at the response. Soonyoung began piling the food onto a plate for Jihoon and handing it to him.

“Oh, oh, an Avengers marathon!” Jisoo screeched and Jihoon was agreeing humming along as they made to the living room. Soonyoung paused him in the kitchen a moment.

“Are you sure you’re alright?” He asked as the others were out of earshot. Jihoon smiled up at him, pressing a chaste kiss to his lips.

“I don’t think I’ve ever been this ‘alright’ in my entire life.” Jihoon quipped, giggling and blowing the hair from his eyes. Soonyoung brushed it back for him and took his coffee, kissing him slowly and following him into the living room. 

 

  * ••••



 

_ Jihoon stood for a moment, stunned in silence as his eyes fell to the scar across Soonyoung’s abdomen.  _

_ “Wh-why didn’t you tell me? Why did you let me assume? I can’t believe you, you’re such an asshole, Soonyoung!” Jihoon finally yelled, breathing heavily as he finished, running a hand through his hair in frustration. Soonyoung wanted to cry, “So, what is it? Cancer? A tumour?” He asked, Soonyoung sighing shakily. _

_ “Stomach cancer actually.” Soonyoung finally got out, watching Jihoon’s expression shift. It was clear now that Jihoon might cry. His eyes had filled and he was looking everywhere but at Soonyoung, fidgeting with his hands. _

_ “H-how long have you known?” He managed to ask, but Soonyoung was shaking his head, trying his best to stop himself from pulling Jihoon into his arms, to let him cry and sob into his chest. _

_ “Only a month or so. They found it before it got serious.” Soonyoung said shortly and he didn’t know why he was telling Jihoon now. He hadn’t wanted to tell him when they were in a relationship and he was certain that Jihoon wouldn’t break Chanyeol’s heart on a sympathy-move. Besides, Soonyoung didn’t want to feel sorry for, he wanted Jihoon to be his again, no repercussions, no sympathy-moves. _

_ “A month, of course, a month,” Jihoon shook his head, sounding almost angry as he got his head around it, “That’s where you were all those nights? You stayed over at hospital? You were in remission whilst I complained about a goddamned fever cold? You didn’t think to tell me because- because of what, Soonyoung? Why didn’t you tell me?” Jihoon was frantic now, stepping forward to reach for Soonyoung, but his fingers fell short and he stared blankly at the place his shirt covered his scar. _

_ “I didn’t want you to worry.” Soonyoung said quietly and he so desperately wanted to break down now he saw Jihoon’s eyes watering, a tear slipping from each eye only to be brushed away quickly with the sleeve of his coat. _

_ “You didn’t want me to worry? Of course I’d have worried, Soonyoung! You were the first person I let myself feel something for and now you’re telling me I got this all wrong? I assumed something because you wouldn’t tell me the truth? I c-can’t do this, Soonyoung, I can’t have this conversation now.” Jihoon stuttered out, brushing his tears away and stepping back again, his eyes darting from Soonyoung’s shirt back to his face and then making for the bathroom door. _

_ “W-wait, Jihoon, wait.” Soonyoung suddenly begged, reaching to grip for his wrist. Jihoon stared at the hand around his wrist for a moment, then met Soonyoung’s gaze, “J-just tell me: would things have been different if I had of told you?” Soonyoung asked pathetically. What was he thinking? He could’ve said anything to make Jihoon stay, but that was what he went for? Jihoon stared at him a moment longer, not pulling his arm away, _

_ “Maybe I would’ve learnt how to love if you had of told me, but I guess we can both lie to ourselves.” Jihoon pulled away, blinking back tears and leaving without another word. Someone found Soonyoung curled up against the stall door having a panic attack not long afterwards. _

 

  * ••••



 

Jihoon had a tendency to lay his head in Soonyoung’s lap these days and if Soonyoung hadn’t kept finding his fingers tangled in Jihoon’s hair then Jihoon probably wouldn’t have continued. He wasn’t affectionate to a great deal- that’s what he said, anyway- but Soonyoung would always make him softer, he’d known him too long to not be able to know his every move. They always seemed to end tangled in one another, hands under shirts or down pants or skating over bare skin. Somehow Jihoon had managed to teach Soonyoung that not every skin-to-skin contact had to lead to sex, but it had always been increasingly difficult when Jihoon looked up at him with those dark, almond shaped eyes. He looked like he was pleading or asking for some sort of retaliation and Soonyoung would indulge him until Jihoon gave up the game, leaving him high and dry. After all they’d been through, Jihoon still managed to make Soonyoung fall at his feet, to have him on his knees when he wanted. He had the power to turn something remotely innocent into something so far from innocent that Soonyoung forgot he had that power within him. It always turned out how Jihoon wanted and Soonyoung almost always let it be. 

They were sat on the balcony, Jihoon tearing notes up and feeding them to the candle they’d lit, letting the flame burn to almost his fingers before throwing it into the air. He watched it fall for a moment, then repeated.

“You should stop doing that, you’ll get in trouble or hurt yourself.” Soonyoung said with a smirk, but he couldn’t bring himself to be stern about it. The likelihood of it falling on someone’s head and catching their hair alight was near to none. 

“Don’t be a killjoy, Soonyoung.” Jihoon tutted, taking the bottle of beer from Soonyoung’s hand and taking a sip, “Besides, I’m celebrating. My exams are down now, that means I’ve got one more year and then I’ll be done.” He smiled, knocking his head back and finishing the rest of the beer, making Soonyoung pout. Jihoon place the bottle aside and leant forward, his hands supporting him either side of Soonyoung’s waist as he kissed him slowly. He tasted like beer and incense and Soonyoung smiled into the kiss, dipping his tongue across Jihoon’s lips and lapping into his mouth.

“Does our plan still stand?” Jihoon asked absently, twining his fingers into the hair at the base of Jihoon’s neck, pulling him back in to kiss him again.

“As long as I’m with you, the plan still stands, Young-ah.” Jihoon mumbled against his lips, trailing a hand up and under Soonyoung’s shirt. And that was it, that was what Jihoon did. He could be throwing burning business notes down fifteen flights one minute, then making out with Soonyoung, confirming that they were eventually going to move in together and sliding a hand under his shirt the next. 

“Are you cold?” Soonyoung asked, flinching as he felt Jihoon’s fingers on his taut abdomen. Jihoon huffed a laugh into his neck, biting and sucking at his throat.

“Mh, a little, I’m okay though.” Jihoon replied, running his fingers up to Soonyoung’s nipples, barely running his fingers over the sensitive skin.

“We should go inside.” Soonyoung said softly, pulling Jihoon’s hips closer and tilting his head, but not making a move to get up.

“Wait, can I ask something?” Jihoon quickly shot up from his neck, his hand dropping from his chest as he positioned himself on his thighs, staring up at him, nerves swimming in his eyes.

“What is it?” Soonyoung asked, cradling his face.

“I n-never got the chance to ask,” Jihoon began, eyes flashing down to where his hand lay on Soonyoung’s hip, “But I missed the six month checkup, by quite a time now. H-how did it go?” Jihoon had been nervous to ask, he knew how much Soonyoung hated talking about it, almost like it were talking about their breakup directly. Soonyoung sighed, smiling softly, but Jihoon couldn’t help but think he was faking it.

“I’m okay. They have to check me every now and then, run some tests, but they think they removed everything. I’ll be fine.” He explained, running his thumb across Jihoon’s cheekbone, a small smile playing on his lips, “Thanks for asking me about it. It means a lot actually.” He added, looking down between them a little embarrassed. Jihoon smiled widely and leant back in, kissing him firmer this time.

“I’m so glad- I’m so glad you’re okay. I hope it stays like this.” Jihoon replied, kissing him again and leaning into his chest to nuzzle his neck, “I- I love you, Soonyoung.” And those words still seemed foreign, still strange to get his mouth around. Soonyoung smiled into his shoulder, wrapping his arms around his lithe body, running his hands up and down his back and over his hips.

“I love you, Jihoon.” And Soonyoung didn’t stutter.

  
  



End file.
